Male sexuality

Men have to deal with sexual frustration on a daily basis so their ability to orgasm is vitally important to them. Faking illustrates how women are more concerned about keeping their partners happy or not appearing inadequate than they are interested in reaching orgasm. Otherwise, presumably they would admit their problem and try to find a solution.
“Biologically and hormonally, men are much more driven to be sexual than women are.” (p86 Mars & Venus in the Bedroom 1995)
Likewise, the debate over which body part needs to be stimulated to cause orgasm (clitoral stimulation is needed for female orgasm) arises because many women don’t know how to orgasm. It is unthinkable that a man would not know that his penis is the source of his orgasm because men tend to know how to achieve their own orgasm.
In relatively new relationships, the novelty of the experience is arousing enough for a man to reach orgasm regardless of his partner’s response. His own sexual arousal is his top priority for his sex life and he does not need to be assured of a woman’s sexual fulfilment.
“In the beginning of a relationship, sexual arousal is much more automatic and quick for a man.” (p15 Mars & Venus in the Bedroom 1995)
Later on, sexual arousal is no longer as automatic so a man needs to build some variety and sexual fantasies around what can become a repetitive act within long-term sexual relationships. The man now looks for a more involved sexual partner who knows how to pleasure a man by engaging on his sexual fantasies and sexual arousal.
“The bottom line of what makes sex fulfilling and memorable for a man is a woman’s fulfilment. When a man is successful in fulfilling her, he feels most fulfilled.” (p70 Mars & Venus in the Bedroom 1995)
Men want to hold onto their sexual fantasies
Men tend to be so absorbed in their own sexual arousal and need for orgasm that they are usually quite oblivious to how women feel. Men have difficulty empathising with the female perspective for a variety of reasons:
They want to hold on to their sexual fantasies
They fear losing out on opportunities to have sex
We often hold men responsible for women’s sexual arousal and men are pressured by feeling inadequate
They are led to expect that a woman should keep a man happy in bed
“Men’s illusions about women are long on fantasy and short on reality and are often based on male-oriented published material … These media stereotypes become the stuff of male fantasy, even, though as any woman knows, they bear little resemblance to the vast majority of real women either emotionally or sexually. … Of course, the more experience a man has with women in the real world, the more clearly he realises how inaccurate the media and locker-room stereotypes are. He continues to hold on to his illusions, however, because he lacks anything more reliable with which to replace them.” (p79 How Men can get more Sex and Women can get more Love 1994)